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09 April 2010 @ 06:03 pm
Trek Fic: If This Were Only Cleared Away (Pike/McCoy, PG)  
Title: If This Were Only Cleared Away (Part 16 of To Talk of Many Things)
Authors: mga1999 and skyblue_reverie
Fandom & Pairing: Star Trek Reboot (aka AOS, ST XI, etc.), Pike/McCoy
Rating: PG
Spoilers: None
Warnings: None
Word Count: around 6200
Summary: The further correspondence of Leonard McCoy and Christopher Pike. What happened after Pike's seizure? D:
Authors' Notes: From skyblue_reverie (the loud one): Thank you to everyone for the birthday gifts & wishes! Also, I've got a habit of taking inspiration from comment conversations and the like, so if you see something in the fic that you recognize from something you said to me, yeah, that's where it's from. ;)

Click here for series masterlist with links to all prior parts

To: Leonard McCoy (lmccoy@starfleet.gov)
From: Philip Boyce (pboyce@starfleet.gov)

Dear Len,

Surgery is over and went as well as expected. They are waiting for his vitals to stabilize and will hopefully start the procedure to remove the toxins in the morning. I've attached the vid of the surgery and updates to his files.

He's in good hands, Len, if that's any consolation.


To: Christopher Pike (cpike@starfleet.gov)
From: Leonard McCoy (lmccoy@starfleet.gov)

Dear Chris,

I know you're in no shape to respond to this, so don't even try. I just wanted to write to you to let you know that I'm thinking of you, and I love you. I've been comming with Philip - in real time, even, including vidcomms.

When I first got Philip's comm that you'd had a seizure and were undergoing surgery, I went a little bit berserk. Think I scared Christine - Chapel, my head nurse, pretty sure I've mentioned her. She's been a rock recently, holding things together in sickbay when I've been - well, you know.

Anyway, I tore onto the bridge and pulled Jim aside. He was nearly as worried as I was. He had a quick confab with Scotty, and suddenly there was some communications array malfunction - some doodad had "broken off" the ship due to "errant space debris," and it was something that Scotty couldn't fabricate himself. It was too dangerous for us to stay in uncharted space with no communications, and we had to get to the nearest outpost in order to send a comm to order the part. Or something like that. I don't really know the details, and I don't really care. The point is, Jim made it happen. We hightailed it to the nearest Federation outpost to order and then wait for the thingamajig, which meant we were there for several days, coincidentally at a facility that had instant communications relay. So even though your surgery was already over by the time I got Philip's comm, it was good to get a chance to catch up with your status, vidcomm with Philip, and even see you, although you were unconscious at the time.

I'd been wondering about the crystal - it had been going white and then flickering rapidly between a lot of different colors. Was doing that when I saw you on the vidcomm, so it must be when you're unconscious and the thoughts and feelings are just sort of randomly coming and going. It's actually kind of pretty, but worrisome now that I know what it means. Of course, more crew members have noticed it, since it's been flashing between colors more rapidly, and that along with my tearing onto the bridge in a panic and our sudden change of course has even wilder rumors flying around.

Apparently it gave a blinding flash of light while I was on duty in sickbay, I passed out, and when I came to I was speaking in tongues and giving Jim instructions from on high about what he had to do next to save your life, and Jim, despite secretly carrying a torch for me, nobly carried out the instructions so that you and I could have our epic romance and I'd be happy, or some damn thing. I don't even know. Christine follows all the rumors - she won't fess up, but I suspect she starts some of them herself - and she gets great amusement out of telling me the latest ones.

Anyway, I'm rambling. Good god, I'm grateful that the procedure seems to have worked. The scar tissue is all gone - that was the easy part - but your spinal fluid so far seems to be completely clear of the Centaurian slug's secretions. I owe a huge debt to Scotty - not just for this latest communication "mishap," but also because he designed the mechanism that let your surgeons filter your cerebral-spinal fluid quickly enough that it could be done without danger to you. Yeah, I synthesized the chemical that neutralized that goddamn stuff, but without Scotty's filter, it wouldn't have done any good because it was too toxic to inject into you directly. Anyway, I'm just glad it all went smoothly - I would've liked more time to test it out, but thank god it worked anyway. And I'm sure Jim will be glad of it too - for your sake, of course, but also because I've been using him and me as human pincushions, taking samples of spinal fluid that I could use for testing. I could have synthesized some, but I never trust synthetics as much as the real thing. Don't worry - it wasn't dangerous to either of us or I wouldn't have done it. A bit uncomfortable, but that's all.

Well, I'll end this now because I don't want to tire you out. You just work on getting better, all right? Listen to Philip and don't push yourself too hard. Fuck, Chris, you gave me a scare.

I know you're in good hands. Can't help wishing that I were there as well, but if wishes were fishes we'd walk on the sea, my daddy used to say. I'm thinking of you, though, dreaming of you, and waiting for the day I get to hold you again.

Yours always,

To: Christopher Pike (cpike@starfleet.gov)
From: James Kirk (jkirk@starfleet.gov)

Dear Chris,

I almost feel like I should thank you for taking the heat off me and my propensity to end up in sick bay. But not at the expense of Bones', and my own, peace of mind. That was not a fun forty-seven hours until Bones could talk to Philip on vidcomm and find out how you really were. I honestly thought I was going to have to sedate him for awhile. I also may be in a little hot water with the admiralty about how I got us to the outpost, but it was worth it.

You gave us quiet a scare, old man. I'm beyond relieved that you are going to be okay and that once again Bones was able to pull a miracle out of his ass to get you fixed up. He says it will take time and the treatment he devised was a little rough... I can attest to part of that even though I was simply donating. Not that I didn't do it gladly, but fuck that hurt. I'm not unconvinced that Bones may have possibly made it hurt on purpose... to get back at me for all of my trips to sickbay. I wouldn't put it past him.

Anyway, I know you won't be up to reading this for awhile, but I just wanted to let you know I was thinking about you and don't rush your recovery. Seriously, Bones doesn't need any more gray hairs. Now, I'm off to play chess with Spock. I'm getting closer to beating him every time we play. He's a much more worthy opponent than Bones, who, obviously, should stick to medicine. I still miss our games though, and hope we can play again in person soon.

Take care of yourself,

To: Christopher Pike (cpike@starfleet.gov)
From: Leonard McCoy (lmccoy@starfleet.gov)

Dear Chris,

We left the outpost yesterday, all ship-shape and ready for the rest of our charting run. The engineers they sent to re-attach whatever bit had broken off the communications array were scratching their heads at how a random piece of space debris had so neatly snapped off that one piece of the ship without damaging anything else around it. I know Jim's had a couple of vidcomms from admirals who are none too pleased about the suspicious timing of the malfunction, but I'm not worried. They won't be able to prove anything, if I know anything about Jim and Scotty. When those two put their heads together, it's a truly frightening thing.

I'm so glad I got to say hello to you, even if only briefly, and even if you were pretty out of it. It's been hell, being so far away while you underwent a serious medical procedure. But everything still looks great, and you should make a full recovery. Knowing you, you'll recover far quicker than you have any right to. Don't push it too hard, though, all right? You'll get there, I promise. And this time there shouldn't be any more relapses, god willing.

While I was at the outpost I had a chance to have a couple vidcomm sessions with Dr. Pagao as well. It's been helpful, Chris. I had my doubts, and yeah, I should know better, but as we both know, feelings aren't always rational. Anyway, we've talked about a lot of stuff, mostly all the crap from before I knew you, but it's kind of good to unload it, you know? I thought rehashing it all would just hurt more - and it does, don't get me wrong, but then after it's over I feel lighter.

Then this morning - Chris, I delivered a baby. Ensign Haddad went into labor at 0200, and at 1032 she gave birth to a baby girl. Mother and child are both healthy as anything, and the baby's already got a powerful set of lungs. She's so beautiful, Chris. She's got a full head of black hair, and gorgeous dark eyes. The ensign named her Akilah. I guess it means "logical" or "one who reasons" in Arabic, and it's a tribute to the loss of Vulcan. Spock and Lt. Uhura have been by to visit, and I can see how touched he is, even if he tries to pretend otherwise. It would take a heart of goddamn stone not to fall in love with that little girl. Anyway, what I'm trying to say, badly, is that - well, I might be ready to think about becoming a father. I'm not ready to commit to it, but - God, Chris, just imagining how you'd look holding a little baby girl or boy of our own, it stirs things in me that I thought were dead. Just please - don't pressure me about it, all right? I'm happy to talk about it, but I need some time to consider the idea before I'm ready to decide, okay?

Well, I'm writing this from my office in sickbay. I'm on duty, and I've gotta go check up on mama and baby, so I'll write more later. I hope you're doing well. I love you, Chris, always.


To: Christopher Pike (cpike@starfleet.gov)
From: Leonard McCoy (lmccoy@starfleet.gov)

Dear Chris,

Hope you're feeling better. You should be up and around by now - I'm still getting daily comms on your progress but since we're back out in the black, they're on a week delay again. It's goddamned irritating, is what it is. But there's nothing we can do about it.

Had a question for you - two actually. But the first one is, do you happen to know anyone who might be willing to go out to my place in Georgia and just open it up, air it out a bit, maybe lay in some supplies for us? No one's lived there in years and I haven't had a caretaker for the place, so I'm not sure what kind of shape it's in. I wasn't sure if maybe Annie would be willing - I'd pay for whatever supplies needed to be bought, and I'd pay her for her time too, of course. Or maybe she knows somebody? If not, don't worry, I'll figure something out. I don't want us to waste any of our time together doing something as mundane as cleaning up and doing repairs on an old house.

Second question; I actually asked you already but I don't think you ever answered. It was about Jim. For a while, when you were going through your surgery and I was freaking out about that, things went back to normal between us. But now, he's acting weird and distant again. I swear he's avoiding me, and he won't look me in the eye. Doesn't spend half the time with me that he used to, and when he does he's acting strange - stilted and unnatural. I don't know what to make of it. I've asked him flat out whether I did something to upset or offend him, and he says no. Then I ask him what's going on and why he's acting this way, and he tries to pretend that he doesn't know what I'm talking about. He's a hell of a good liar when it comes to bluffing alien leaders (just last week he prevailed in a pissing match with some hostile alien general by pretending that if they attacked us, we'd self-destruct and it'd blow up some imaginary substance on the ship that would take out half the galaxy, or some damn thing), but when it comes to his friends, the man couldn't fib to save his life. Something's up. Something's changed, and damned if I know what. Chris - do you have any idea? I'm not accusing you of anything, I swear it. I just don't know if maybe you said something to him that he might have taken the wrong way? I don't know. I'm grasping at straws here, but he's pulling away from me, and, well, you know how well I take it when the people I love do that.

In happier news. It's mid-March now - back on earth, at my place in Georgia, the trees would all be in full blossom. That's my favorite time of year. Someday we'll have to spend blossom season together in Georgia. The scent is just out of this world. But even better, that means it's not too long until June, when we'll be back together on earth, and all of those trees will have set fruit and be leafy and gorgeous, just perfect for picnics. June's warm in Georgia, but it's downright pleasant compared to July or August. So it should be just about ideal timing for us to be there, really.

I'm looking forward to meeting your parents, Chris, even though it also scares the hell out of me. And I'm looking forward to going with you as your date to Matthew's wedding. He seemed like a good kid when I met him at your birthday dinner. So tell me, darlin', do you get misty at weddings? Should I bring an extra pocket handkerchief to slip you when they're saying their vows? Being a manly southerner, of course I'd never do anything so silly as get all emotional at a wedding. Oh, hell, who am I kidding, I'll probably bawl like a baby. I always get tearful at weddings. God, my family used to tease me about it something fierce. As if half of 'em didn't do the same damn thing, and I don't just mean the female half.

Well, I think that's about it from here right now. Whenever you're feeling up to it, write to me and let me know how you're doing, okay? I think about you all the time, darlin'. I love you.


To: Leonard McCoy (lmccoy@starfleet.gov)
From: Christopher Pike (cpike@starfleet.gov)

Dear Len,

I'm dictating this to text. I know you would rather hear my voice -- I really don't have much more than a whisper right now from being in that medically induced coma for so long. So it's probably going to take me a week or so to finish this. So excuse the time shifts.

I'm doing okay. I'm more tired than I've ever been in my life, but the docs say that will improve fairly quickly as long as I rest. I cannot tell you how many times they have told me that. So I'm trying. The headaches are lessening, and even though I'm feeling very stiff all over, the numbness and tingling sensations are completely gone. Haven't been allowed out of bed yet; they are waiting to make sure they won't need to do more of the treatment protocol you designed.

I don't really remember anything that happened. I remember eating in the mess, first time in a couple days, as I had been vomiting -- I later learned that was a symptom of what was happening to me. I remember going back to my quarters. I sat down at my desk to get some work done and next thing I know, it's over a week later and I'm waking up at the starbase with I swear to god fifty doctors surrounding me. I remember them asking me a couple simple questions which I could barely whisper an answer to and then I was out again.

I think the day I talked to you, or should I say, saw you on vidcomm, was the first time I was awake after that. I don't remember much of that either. I was just glad to see you and hear your voice.

Now it's four days since I started this. My voice still isn't back, but I'm typing slowly. I've walked from my biobed to the bathroom, but God, Len, it's back to feeling like I've run a marathon when I do that. I've talked to Philip on vidcomm and he promises that even though I'm going to be tired for a few months, I'll be running on the treadmill again pretty quickly, and better than I was before. Right now, I'm having a hard time believing that. Fuck, this paragraph took me almost fifteen minutes to finish.

I think I'm going to stop. I'm getting frustrated and -- Well, I think you know. I'm probably trying too hard, but I just wanted to write you back since I've gotten several comms from you. I promise I'll answer them as soon as I'm able.

I love you, Len. Thank you for saving my life again in more ways than just with the procedure.

Love you so much,

To: Christopher Pike (cpike@starfleet.gov)
From: Leonard McCoy (lmccoy@starfleet.gov)

Dear Chris,

I'm torn - one the one hand, it's so goddamned good to hear from you, to know you're okay. On the other hand, I don't want you to push yourself too hard and make yourself worse just so you can comm me.

I know that it's frustrating, but Philip's right. Your recovery this time is going to be so much faster than it was before. By the time we see each other in June, you should be at least back to feeling as good as you were when you took command of the Exeter, if not even better.

I hate not being there. I hate it, Chris. I feel goddamned useless. Shit, sorry. This isn't about me. You're going to be just fine, darlin', I swear it. And when we see each other you're going to run circles around me - or, more likely, and much more fun, you're going to make love to me for hours and hours on end.

I love you too, Chris. Being with you makes life worth living for me. So promise me you'll take good care of yourself, all right?

Yours forever,

To: Leonard McCoy (lmccoy@starfleet.gov)
From: Christopher Pike (cpike@starfleet.gov)

Dear Len,

You were right. It wasn't as bad as last time, not even close, considering I'm back on the Exeter and doing better than most of the last couple of months I was on her. As much as I wanted to write you, I just took your advice and just pretty much did nothing but sleep and go to p.t. and honestly did nothing that would come close to stressing myself out. Not that writing you stresses me out, but when my fingers weren't quite doing what my mind wanted, or vice versa -- It was just discouraging.

So yeah, I'm back on my ship finishing my recovery here. I won't be back on any kind of duty for a couple more weeks, but Philip doesn't even think I'll need to return under light duty or split shifts again. I would say I didn't believe him, but considering last time I wrote you I could barely make it to the bathroom and now I can walk several miles on the treadmill -- Well, I almost believe it. I am being very careful, though, and doing exactly what the docs and Philip say. I guess it makes sense when the procedure was on something that basically allows me to move and my brain to function -- Well, if rest helps my body recover quicker, I've been doing it. I certainly want to be in tip top shape when I see you in June.

Speaking of June and your question. I am absolutely positive that Annie would be glad to get your place back in order. I swear that woman thrives on doing things like that. Besides my place, she takes care of the other houses my parents have and a couple other friends' places. She's always going and opening them up and cleaning before the seasons start. I will comm her and we'll work out the details.

As far as crying at weddings? Well, in the past, I have not gotten emotional. I have been to many weddings, I have performed many weddings -- Granted this will be different because it's my godson, but mostly it will be different because of you. What I'm trying to say, and badly as usual, is that it might be a good idea to bring that extra handkerchief.

I would love to show you my ranch in Mojave, but honestly, Len, June is not the time to visit. That's one reason Annie will be more than glad to escape, even to Georgia. I'm sure it's warm there, but nothing compared to the desert in June. June is the hottest month. Next time we are on shore leave though, I will certainly take you to our home.

Okay, I'm trying to run through these comms. I might need another one to fully catch up. As good as I'm feeling, I get tired pretty quickly, but I'm fine to keep going for bit longer. I promise.

I looked back at the last few comms that Jim and I sent to each other. Len, I know I may not communicate well to you, but Jim and I, we kind of speak the same language, and I honestly don't see anything I could have said that he would take the wrong way. If you want, I'll send mine to you and you can take a look. He seemed fine when I talked to him on vidcomm when you were re-supplying. He seemed a little tired -- a little more stressed than usual. Now, the last comm I got from him was a little -- I don't know, I guess the word you used, stilted, sums it up. He just didn't seem like himself. The words were there, and I could see him trying to be him, but he just wasn't. I'm sure he'll get over it. I'm sure what happened to me and how worried you were -- and frankly the last few months couldn't have been easy on him. Maybe he just needs some space to regroup. I wouldn't worry about it. I'm sure he'll be back to driving you crazy soon enough.

Well, honey. I'm getting to that point where I need to stop. I will write you again tomorrow though and finish up the rest of what I missed.

I love you, honey. I'm so lucky to have you in my life.


To: Leonard McCoy (lmccoy@starfleet.gov)
From: Christopher Pike (cpike@starfleet.gov)

Hey honey,

Sorry it ended up being a couple of days. I've been especially wiped the last two for some reason, which Philip tells me is normal. I'm a little tired of sleeping though if that makes sense. I swear when I bring up a concern I can almost answer for him now. "That's normal, Chris. Listen to your body." Well, I'm waiting for the time when my body starts listening to me again. Yeah, yeah, I'm getting a bit impatient again, but I'm listening. Really I am.

Now, back to all those unanswered comms. I just want to say, so you don't think I'm ignoring it, that last comm you sent me after we had the counseling session. I don't think I'm quite ready to bring up our issues yet, but I agree that I don't want to stop writing you. I've talked to Dr. Elliott since then, and I think we both took her too literally when she was throwing out suggestions. She sees nothing wrong with us continuing to write. She just feels we shouldn't make any 'life-changing plans,' as she put it, until we've made progress on those issues. I do agree with that. We already both have a lot of baggage coming into this relationship. I also want to believe that when we've both dealt with that, the issues that we do have aren't going to seem so insurmountable. Did I explain that all right, honey?

I'm shaking my head now reading my last comm before I got so sick. I can't believe I forgot about that bottle of red wine. I can see it clear as day now, but I swear -- Some of those words I wrote don't even seem familiar to me. I swear at one point in that comm I was going to write you, 'next time I'm at your farm in Georgia' -- I was convinced I'd already been there. Maybe just from that dream or what you told me about it. But I seriously was convinced I'd been to your place in Georgia, Len. That was kind of scary, but at least I realized I hadn't before I'd said anything.

Speaking of Georgia. I already heard back from Annie. She's thrilled to help. So if you want to forward me all the info, I can pass it on to her or you can contact her directly. Whichever you prefer. Just let me know. She's so excited to meet you and happy to do this for us.

I bet I can tell you which two admirals are hounding Jim. Don't worry, Barnett and Archer will go to bat for Jim. These particular two admirals never liked me much, so unfortunately that makes Jim an easy target. Their bark is worse than their bite because frankly, no one really listens to them. If for some reason there is a problem, let me know. I have ways of dealing with them. Believe me.

I don't even know how to explain how I feel about -- Well, about Jim doing that for me. Of course I know he did it more for you, but still, it means a lot. I obviously owe Scotty a bottle or twelve of his favorite poison too, so let me know. I can arrange to get that to him when we are on earth in June. Money is no object.

I have not laughed so much in -- Well, I think the last time I laughed that hard was when I was with you on earth in October. That story you told about the latest rumors? Fuck, Len. I'm laughing just thinking about it. Yes, you have mentioned Chapel before, but I knew her and have worked with her before. She's a gem. You're lucky to have her.

I'm glad things are going well with Dr. Pagao. Yeah, talking about the past isn't easy, but I'm finding the more I do -- It does weigh less heavily on you. Dr. Rossen thinks my PTSD will improve greatly if I'm truly free of the bug and what it did to me. I won't have that constant reminder, the pain, the disabilities. Now, I'm not saying you didn't fix everything, Len, so please don't take offense. I think I just need a little time to believe that -- That something isn't going to come up again. Or there aren't still toxins hiding somewhere in my brain just waiting. I know nothing is guaranteed, but give me some time to believe that it's really gone, okay?

Speaking of believing. I know you aren't religious, but I've told you I say a prayer now and then. When I read about the baby you delivered and what you said after. God, Len. I'm not going to push you. I'm not going to pressure you, but reading that -- I had tears falling down my face, Len. Not just because of the possibility that I might have a child someday, but because you could finally see it as something you might deserve. To me, that was a beautiful, beautiful gift, and an answered prayer.

Well, I think I've covered everything. If I missed something, just remind me. I'm still not quite functioning on all thrusters, as Philip has been teasing me by saying. Still, I feel like a new man, Len, and fuck, it feels amazing.

Counting the days until I can see you.

I love you.


To: Christopher Pike (cpike@starfleet.gov)
From: Leonard McCoy (lmccoy@starfleet.gov)

Hey Darlin',

Glad to hear you're feeling better, even if not 100% yet. Good lord, Chris, you've got no idea what a relief it is that the procedure went smoothly and that your recovery is proceeding so well, especially given that I'm not there to oversee it personally. It's been driving me a little crazy. Philip's been really damn patient with my constant comms and requests for information. He's a good man, Chris. I feel better knowing you've got him there with you.

Thanks for talking to Annie. I'll let you handle the logistics with her, if it's not too much trouble. I'm attaching the contact info for my parents' estate attorney to this comm - she's got the keys (yes, old-fashioned key locks), alarm codes, and so forth. I've sent her a separate comm authorizing both you and Annie to act on my behalf with regard to the property. Just so you know, I also asked her to put together a will for me that names you as my beneficiary. Some things will go to Jim, and a few family heirlooms to my cousin Pamela, but other than that, it's yours. Now, don't argue with me on this. It's my stuff to do with as I please, and I want you to have it. Not that I plan on having anything happen to me anytime soon. I'll want to drop by the lawyer's office when we're in town and get everything all signed and official. As you said to me once, having my affairs in order gives me peace of mind.

As far as the wedding, I'll load up on handkerchiefs, and during the vows I'll probably be squeezing your hand so tight my knuckles will be white. Just kick me if I start to cut off your circulation, all right, darlin'? I can't wait to dance with you at the reception. It'll remind me of the Officers' Ball, and how I felt on that night.

It's all right that we can't go to your ranch this visit - it was probably too much to try to fit in anyway, given that we've only got what, two weeks or so that we'll overlap on Earth? But at some point, I really would like to see it, to see the desert through your eyes. Whenever you think would be good.

Thanks for checking your comms with Jim to see if there was anything odd in there. I know you two understand each other, so I didn't have much hope that it was anything like that. I don't know, Chris. He's still acting weird. Spock's his new best friend and he'll barely look at me, but when he does he looks so sad and guilty. I'll take your advice and give him some room right now, but if he's still acting like this after shore leave in June, I'm going to get to the bottom of it no matter what it takes. And I think it might take a Centaurian slug. Sorry. Just my gallows humor.

All right, so we both took Dr. Elliott too literally. We'll work on our own shit, and just be gentle with each other in the meantime, until we can really dig into the issues between us. Is that about the size of it? I don't know about this "no life-changing plans" business, because - well, if there's anything that I've learned, especially in the last few months, it's that everything can change in a moment, and there's no guarantees in life. I don't want to defer anything until some theoretical date in the future when we've somehow "fixed" all of our issues. Maybe I'm being too literal again.

Good god, Chris, it must have been scary as hell when you realized your memory was playing tricks on you. I'm sorry you had to go through that. At least for me, that scares me much more than losing physical ability - losing my mental abilities. You've been incredibly strong throughout this whole ordeal, Chris, and I just want you to know that I have noticed and that I think you're amazing. I do understand why you're still reluctant to let yourself believe that it's all over. Hopefully time will bear out your doctors’ predictions and you'll feel more confident.

I'll convey to Jim your offer to help with the nasty admirals if he needs it. I swear, Starfleet politics. I'm damn relieved that I'm only tangentially involved with it all. I'm even more relieved that I've got both you and Jim in my corner if the shit ever hits the fan. You two could probably stage a coup and take over the Federation if you put your minds to it. Not that you would, or that I'd want you to. That kind of power is a damn sight more trouble than it's worth, if you ask me.

Jim did what he did to get to the Federation outpost just as much for you as for me. He'd tear the world apart for anyone he loves, and you and I are lucky enough to be on that very short list. I know you feel the same about both of us, and obviously I feel the same way about both of you, not that I've got a starship at my command. Still, if either of you ever needed anything that was mine to give, I hope you know you'd have it, no questions asked.

Scotty, none too surprisingly, drinks Scotch. I'm not much of a Scotch drinker myself, so I don't know what's good, but I'm sure any kind of fine Scotch would make him a very happy chief engineer indeed.

I'm glad you're enjoying the stories of the rumors. I swear to god, Chris, it's like we're starring in a holo-novela series with the way people are speculating about our love life. What did they used to call 'em - soap operas? Odd name, but anyway, it's like that. Christine tells me that the latest speculation is that you had an affair with Jim's mother back in the day and that Jim's actually your son. Not that I'd believe it for even a second, but you two are as alike as two peas in a pod, so I can see why people would think that. So anyway, now apparently you two are the tragically separated father and son, and even more tragically, you've now both fallen for the same man. Yeah, that'd be me. I don't know, Chris. I can only shake my head. Jim's taken to calling me "step-mom" - that is, when he's talking to me at all. I swear, Chris, if my life were any more bizarre I'd just give up and join the circus.

I'm glad that the story about baby Akilah and her mom and my reaction to it made you so happy. They're both still doing great. Ensign Haddad is on maternity leave now, and when we get back to earth she's going to take an extended leave of absence to be with the baby, then probably take a planetside posting. Spock still spends a lot of time with the baby, and he's already trying to teach her mathematics even though she's only a few weeks old. She just looks at him with those huge eyes as if he's the most fascinating thing she's ever seen. Well, given that she hasn't seen that much yet, he probably is. I see mama and baby every few days just to check up on both of them, make sure everything's okay. I can't fathom being a single parent - I mean I know folks do it every day, but damn, it's tough. She's coping all right, though.

Are you back on duty now? If so, how's that been? Did Sato and the rest of your bridge crew keep everything running smoothly, and are they as glad to have you back up and running as I am?

Well, I think that's about it for now, and I'm on duty in an hour, so I'd better get my ass in gear. Stay well, and know that I'm thinking about you always. I love you, darlin'.


On to Part 17
Duty & Devotion: star trek janeway goddessroseandheather on April 10th, 2010 01:20 am (UTC)
Happy Janeway is happy. Happy Janeway is licking you now!
Sky: [star trek aos] karl D faceskyblue_reverie on April 10th, 2010 08:37 pm (UTC)
Oooooh! That makes me happy in turn! *licks Janeway back* :DDD
sanguesangueuk on April 10th, 2010 01:21 am (UTC)
read it, loved it! Have to sleep now! Can't wait to find out what's up with Jim...
Sky: [star trek aos] bones healerskyblue_reverie on April 10th, 2010 08:38 pm (UTC)
Thanks, bb! Hope you slept well. :)
an asphyxiating miasma of hipness: Pike/McCoyhilsongirl on April 10th, 2010 01:28 am (UTC)
i have come to expect that "skyblue_reverie has updated her journal" notification and it never dissapoints.

PS: love the reference to the corbomite bb!
Sky: [star trek aos] pike mccoy heartskyblue_reverie on April 10th, 2010 08:40 pm (UTC)
Awww! *blush* That's so super-flattering. Thank you!

Oh, you get the gold star for catching the corbomite ref! Was wondering if anyone would notice it! :D
secretsolitairesecretsolitaire on April 10th, 2010 01:30 am (UTC)
Apparently it gave a blinding flash of light while I was on duty in sickbay, I passed out, and when I came to I was speaking in tongues and giving Jim instructions from on high about what he had to do next to save your life, and Jim, despite secretly carrying a torch for me, nobly carried out the instructions so that you and I could have our epic romance and I'd be happy, or some damn thing. I don't even know.

*claps* Oh, this is too funny. I feel like I've totally read this in a fanfic or something. ;-)

This was a lovely chapter. I'm so glad Pike is probably going to heal normally this time, yay! I loved the little detail about the new baby being named in honor of Vulcan -- very touching.

I have a theory about what's wrong with Jim, but I'll just wait and see if I'm right. :-)
Geekygeeky_ramblings on April 10th, 2010 02:08 am (UTC)
YAY a much upbeat correspondence. I am happy to see Leonard's mind toward children changing and Chris is starting to get better. I just want everything with Jim and Leonard to get better. If that counselor had something to do with it, they deserve to have their butt kicked.

Another wonderful chapter :D
(no subject) - skyblue_reverie on April 10th, 2010 08:43 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - skyblue_reverie on April 10th, 2010 08:42 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(Deleted comment)
Sky: [star trek aos] pike capt fine v01skyblue_reverie on April 10th, 2010 08:51 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much! I'm glad that you enjoyed the developments in this chapter. As for what's to come, you'll just have to wait and see! ;) *iz such a tease*

The Hysterical Hystorian: Star Trek: McCoy/Pikeabigail89 on April 10th, 2010 02:25 am (UTC)
Oh I'm so happy! Thank you for a happy, hopeful entry.

I do love that Len has started to change his mind about having children (though, the both of them should spend time with a 2 year old. That'll make them think again!). Probably did so much to improve Chris's mood.

Thank you for this: We'll work on our own shit, and just be gentle with each other in the meantime, until we can really dig into the issues between us. It's so hard to really deal with the tough issues when you aren't there in the same room. Yeah, be gentle--let them be gentle with each other, authors.

I am showering you both with cherry blossoms and sweet green leaves and all the beauty of spring. My heart is as light as Len's and Chris's right now.

Except what is UP with Jim? Hmmmm....I hope there isn't anything evil afoot. You two...

Lovely. Sweet. YAY!
Sky: [star trek aos] pike mccoy b&w bedskyblue_reverie on April 10th, 2010 09:00 pm (UTC)
Aww, bb, I am so happy for such a beautiful, happy comment!

Ahahaha I totally agree with you on the second thoughts if they spent time around an actual little kid. OMG it's exhausting. Even when you love the little buggers, they're still exhausting. ;)

It really is hard to work out tough issues long-distance. Of course, the temptation when you're together is to ignore the issues so you can enjoy the time together, not be dealing with painful stuff. It's quite a conundrum!

Awww, thank you for the cherry blossom shower! I adore cherry blossoms. I am so glad that this lightened your heart.

Oh, there's always something evil afoot. You do know us. ;)

Thank you, bb! Yayyyy! ♥
snitches be crazy: st - pike/mccoyshighola on April 10th, 2010 02:48 am (UTC)
Ok, first of all HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY skyblue_reverie!!!!!

I was working on a deliciously pr0ny b-day fic for you, but then the boys started misbehaving (not in the good way) and it is on hold for now. Hopefully I'll be able to wrestle them into submission soon.
*crosses fingers*

Also, I adore you both for the happy, loving chapter.

Don't think I've forgotten about whatever the hell Dr. Elliott said to make Jim all weird. But I can wait for now.

Edited at 2010-04-10 02:49 am (UTC)
Sky: [star trek aos] pike mccoy academyskyblue_reverie on April 10th, 2010 09:23 pm (UTC)
Thank you for the birthday wishes! :D Oh, man, I know about uncooperative boys. No worries. If it happens, I will love it, but if not, don't stress yourself out over it. Of course, wrestling them into submission kind of sounds like fun... ;)

I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter, and thanks for your patience regarding the Jim weirdness! :D

Thanks, as always, for the comment. ♥
random00brandom00b on April 10th, 2010 05:22 am (UTC)
I only have one response to this chapter: what's up with Kirk? 'Cause Bones should be 100% focused on Pike and he's got to worry about the Jim-being-distant thing? Eek!
Sky: [star trek aos] bones nameskyblue_reverie on April 10th, 2010 09:27 pm (UTC)
Re: Weird
It's always something, isn't it? ;)
Re: Weird - random00b on April 10th, 2010 10:38 pm (UTC) (Expand)
amine_eyesamine_eyes on April 10th, 2010 08:46 am (UTC)
Jim and Scotty being absolutely awesome! In fact the second comm in general, what with Len saying "doodad" and "thingamijig", and the rumour :P
Working through issues!
Chris getting better!
Mandatory angst with Len and Jim this time!
Trying to make things clear on both sides!

Sheer win you two :D
(and birthday fic on the way ... ish. When I stop drooling over the pike_mccoy icon and actually get to writing it :P)
Sky: [star trek aos] karl backseatskyblue_reverie on April 10th, 2010 09:34 pm (UTC)
Eeee, thank you! Glad you enjoyed so much about this chapter. We're both having fun with those rumors. :D

Aww, you are sweet to write me birthday fic. No rush, though. Feel free to drool as loooong as you need. Those two are well-worth drooling over!

(no subject) - amine_eyes on April 10th, 2010 10:12 pm (UTC) (Expand)
sexycazzy: Pike/Bonessexycazzy on April 10th, 2010 09:21 am (UTC)
That was just brilliant and a happy chapter. Really glad to see Chris recovering well and that this time around, he shares so much with Bones, instead of hiding it from him the first time around. ::)) Awww...really glad that Bones is starting to feel a bit more confident about the possibility of having a child with Chris...that would be lovely.

Now, what's this about Kirk? Am really worried about him. *worried*

Can't wait for the next update! ::))
Sky: [star trek aos] bones intentskyblue_reverie on April 10th, 2010 09:47 pm (UTC)
Aww, thank you so much! Very happy that you enjoyed the chapter. Both boys are beginning to learn, I think. Slowwwwwwwly, but still. ;) Except Jim. :P

Thank you so much for the comment, bb!
a particularly troubled Romulan: st:xispocklookingupillariy on April 10th, 2010 10:30 am (UTC)
Huh. After this chapter, I am now tentatively optimistic about their relationship's future. We'll see if that is warranted or if you two are just leading us around by the nose. XD Also, I'm adding myself to the queue of people worried about Kirk.
Sky: [star trek aos] pike mccoy enterpriseskyblue_reverie on April 10th, 2010 09:48 pm (UTC)
Oh, interesting - before this you weren't optimistic about their future? I'm just curious, not saying anything one way or the other about what'll happen. :D

Thanks for the comment, and for your patience on the Kirk issue! :)
(no subject) - illariy on April 11th, 2010 11:02 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - skyblue_reverie on April 11th, 2010 05:06 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Weeping Naiad: ST: Pike/Kirk/McCoyweepingnaiad on April 10th, 2010 09:16 pm (UTC)
Thank goodness! *is relieved* I was so very worried for Pike!

I absolutely adored what Scotty and Jim did for Len! That's definitely them.

Loved the upbeat tone of this one. Was so happy that they're talking to each other and to therapists, dealing with their own issues and being gentle with each other. Now if only someone would set Jim straight, it'd be perfect!

Yes, pushy, demanding reader is pushy and demanding! ^_^

Loved it!
Sky: [star trek aos] karl heartskyblue_reverie on April 10th, 2010 09:52 pm (UTC)
Aww, bb, thank you for the comment! Sorry to have worried you so, but it is gratifying that we managed to build suspense. :) And I'm glad that you enjoyed the happier tone of this chapter.

As for Scotty and Jim, I'm hoping that more and more, we'll be able to bring in the other crewmembers and their role in Bones's life (and indirectly, Chris's). It's a lot to deal with, though, so we'll see how it goes! Definitely we want to keep the focus on Chris and Len, with mandatory appearances by Jim.

Yeah, someone needs to find out what's up with Jim, but then, life's never perfect, and if it was, it'd be boring, right? ;)

Dala: acid_graphics - kirk is awesomethe_dala on April 11th, 2010 06:31 pm (UTC)
Heeeee, Corbomite Manuever.

Now I'm dying to know what the hell's going on with Jim...
Sky: [star trek aos] jim bones high maintenanskyblue_reverie on April 11th, 2010 08:43 pm (UTC)
Good catch on the Corbomite Maneuver! :D As for Jim, well, gotta wait and see... ;)
elfsausage: bones-pike-yessirelfsausage on April 11th, 2010 06:56 pm (UTC)
Oh thank the gods! I've been on tenterhooks for days wanting to know what was going to happen with Pike!

You guys have got me more caught up with this story than with any other fanfic I've ever read. It's positively addictive!

So now I'm all wrigglyexcited about what's up with Jim and can't wait for the next bit :-)

*smooches you*
Sky: [star trek aos] pike mccoy enterpriseskyblue_reverie on April 11th, 2010 08:45 pm (UTC)
Aww, that is such a sweet thing to say! Yay, we're addictive! \o/


Thanks so much for the lovely comment, bb. *smooches back*
ellie_pierson: Pike/McCoy fly with meellie_pierson on April 11th, 2010 08:25 pm (UTC)
I have been waiting all weekend for this story. There are too many family obligations to be able to read from Friday night to Sunday afternoon. I've been itching to get at the computer.

I'm so glad that Chris is okay now. I love the rumor about Chris and Len's epic romance. It seems the crew of the Enterprise are very imaginative.

May I friend you to keep up with your writings?
Sky: [star trek aos] pike mccoy heartskyblue_reverie on April 11th, 2010 08:50 pm (UTC)
Oh, man, I totally know about those darn RL obligations keeping you away from fannish things. Sucks, doesn't it? Stupid families. ;)

Hee hee. Yeah, the crew are definitely pretty imaginative. I imagine it like a big game of telephone - "did you hear the latest? xyz!" and then it gets passed on "did you hear the latest? xyz+n!" or whatever. And it just gets more and more outrageous as it gets passed around. With some of the crewmembers (*cough* Christine Chapel *cough*) totally deliberately adding things she knows are ridiculous just for entertainment factor. "I know it sounds unbelievable, but Chapel works with him and she saw it!" :D

Please, do friend me! I shall friend you back. I love having new LJ friends. ♥